|
NumberYourself12
|
read my profile
sign my guestbook
Name: Kelli
Gender: Female
Interests: Music, Moshing, Politics, Reading, Dreaming, Dancing, Creativity, Disfunction, Silly beans, Dynamics, Confusion, Pyschology, Writing, Workings, Abuse, Prevention, Wheat Thins, Strong Black Tea.
Expertise: Politics, Religion, and Complusion.
Occupation: Transplanter
Industry: Greenhouse
Message: message me
AIM:  kelliermie5
MSN: music_freak1993@hotmail.com
Member Since:
1/24/2009
|
|
| Three years.
Came down to five days.
In the quickest way.
The best, beyond.
Like everything that mattered,
mattered less when we were one.
And everything that didn't,
the physical affectionate
mattered more.
Because it completed everything
it made love.
Love that has brought to me so much light.
And I'm drowning in it.
It really does just flow over you.
Like water; is love.
| | |
| I'm ready for the simple things again.
Order, Desgin, and Passion.
Order like the way it structures life.
I swear to Satan, without it I couldn't
Design a successful formula
for success. Not that it wouldn't require the
Passion to begin with, the only component
left to maintain a certain level of
Control.
And love.
both of which run the globe I sit on at night
with shimmery hope of silver light, that I call
Contempt.
And it sings, cheerful
The way that it twists irony, spits out reality and says;
TRY AGAIN.
So it's back to the roots.
back to the conversation and the books.
the commitment and control.
For the world to be whole.
| | |
| It's been like, what, five months?
Maybe six.
I miss xanga very much.
Life has changed significantly, I would say.
I'm trying to make my priorities, and stay out of people's way.
But really, I'm just trying to ignore:
people, time, and distance.
So needless to say, things are going well.
My control is much better than it use to be.
I'm very much sober.
Very much grounded in the same beliefs that drove me away.
But I'm here. At least for the next year.
And that's okay.
| | |
| I'm going to stop posting for awhile (obvious maybe, since I haven't lately) because my parents are literally watching every single move I make. I can't really express how badly I want to get out of this place, and how bright the future looks right now. Things with Rose in Chicago are really coming together. She's getting an apartment I can move into as soon as I graduate next year. I found a school down there with an awesome substance abuse program, and an even better literature one. Both are pretty appealing, and relatively cheep since it's a city college. Parker will move in with us then too, so that's a big plus.
So I guess, despite all the bad going on, like me trying to stay sober, and my parents disapproving of everything I've done with my life, I'm excited for things coming up.
Just not the ACT, which is two weeks from now. Wish me luck in life. I'll try to come back to this when I can move out, but until then, I don't think it would be safe.
I love all the friends I've met on here though, you are all so dear to me. It's hard to say goodbye.
| | |
| 
I'm a constant call for hope, and I'll taunt your every feeling of pain.
I'm fucking the idea of ideal.
I wish I could stop punching walls.
I want to have my own beliefs.
Not even though.
I just want to be given the chance to find them.
DISCOVERY ISN'T THE DEVIL.
| | |
|
